Manners & Etiquettes

[Umm Mohammad]

Question: We are living as a minority in the lands of the kuffar. Many incidents of verbal abuse occur here. For instance, you may be driving a vehicle and some of the kuffar use hand signals or yell out to you. Are you able to retaliate with the like of them, i.e., make hand signals back or stop the car to threaten them or should you have sabr (patience) so that you can also give them Dawah to Islaam?

Answer: The answer is as the Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم said:" the Muslim is not one who curses others nor is he one who is a constant criticizer nor does he have a filthy mouth or filthy actions." [1] This type of filth that is done with hand signals and verbal threats/abuse is not to be retaliated with its like, because the Believer, as the Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم said, is not filthy in his actions or statements. Allaah سبحانه و تعالى says when describing the servants of Ar-Rahmaan:

{and if they pass by some evil play or evil talk, they pass by it with dignity.} [Al-Furqaan 25:72]

Also, Allaah سبحانه و تعالى says:

{And turn away from the foolish} [Al-Araaf 7:199]

However, if it is at all possible to give this person some advice or dawah, then this should be done, if not, then one should walk by them, as the poet says: "And I may walk by a foolish person and he curses me and I keep on walking and I say that doesn't concern me." Meaning that you walk by these types of people and you deal with them like you didn't even see them do anything or hear them say anything.

Answered by: Shaykh Abdur-Razzaq bin Abdul-Muhsin Al-Abbaad

[1] Reported by at-Tirmidhee. Shaykh al-Albaanee رحمه الله says Saheeh in Jaami' Tirmidhee 4/350 (#1977) and Saheeh al-Jaami' (#5381).